You, I, We are Special!

I’ve always had a problem in accepting that there are people whom I Love will Never approve my Love at all. I’m at my lowest when I’m in that zone.

These things confirm my belief that I’m not up to the mark, I don’t even know what that mark is. This self deprecating energy has caused a lot of lose in energy, money, time.

When all hell breaks lose, when I thought this is final blow in my cemetery, when I felt I had nothing to lose came liberation. The idea of abundance and self love.

Now I really feel that I’ve wasted many years in indulgence with sulking. The only shining spectacle is though is my love for my art form and the people around me. It may sound ironic but Love saved me from what I thought is Love.

The Love which the Abundance showed me, the abundant love that my people had for me. When I was abundantly rich and leading a pleasure life, I refused to recognise those things and was chasing something else. This realisation is the biggest take away.

I’m not sure how the life is going to be hereafter, it may be worse, it may be challenging, it may be lonely and boring but I’ve got the confidence that I’ll survive, cherish all those and come out breathing because I’ve seen the Joy of loving myself and living by being myself. There’s no external factors which made me happy, but I choose to be happy and I live happily and make my own World in that process.

This life fuelled with compassion and love is all I got and I better live that Life to the fullest with atmost respect and recognition that it deserves.

Love with Abundance!

With all the exploring, Self Love, Liberation that I’ve experienced in the recent months, which was in turn co incided with an awake of a heart break, Kind of realised a strange thing.

All my life I’ve felt myself of as hopelessly romantic, dire heart lover and all these. But now I don’t feel romantic after all. This Abundance has expanded the range abundantly where I’ve attained a stage where I truly can’t converge my love or attention for a single person. You empathise, be compassionate, shower affection and care to other person. This unconditional love is what I’m capable of. I just couldn’t handle the pressure of being a person with someone’s expectations, it feels caged and wings cut off.

This liberation, even if I’m aware of the repercussions is truly a realisation. The great news is that I’ve never known what I’m missing. To being loved. I’m not used to being loved. And I wouldn’t know what to do or never know. I’ve showered all my love and now the Abundance righteously returns it to me in multiple folds in which I’m drenched.

Probably that’s enough. That’s more than enough!

All is gonna be Well!

There would be days however you feel content with yourself, the freedom you would enjoy, free from all the cage of belongingness, you would feel lonely.

You’ll be pushed into an eternal questions of companionship. You’ll seek the need of acceptance, you’ll adore the idea of sharing with that special person. You dig deeper. You let yourself free fall into it. You accept being a person who craves love. You search for acknowledgement for your grief, your happiness, your achievements, your failures.

We’re human beings and the reality is expecting that acceptance. Otherwise you would feel aimless, hopeless. Even when you’re stubborn with the idea of self love, there would be momentary lapses. Self Love is beautiful feeling but it’s a bit complicated.

Your search for a special love arises, it becomes a needy pleasure which can be satisfied by an external Love. These are all human emotions at the least. As humans we feel, we expect.

But the higher power gives us a positive streak. Most times this slip into normalcy and our loved ones comes to aid. This is where your life from the past helps you. How have you been in your prime time, most importantly how have you been in your adversity.

These adverse moments of weakness is arrived into a caring. This time it’s not directly because of you. It’s because of the hope you had for the unconditional love you’ve imbibed from other persons.

Your Mom, Your Sister, Your Brother, Your Friends. They come for rescue. They casually turn around your mood with their Love. The Love they show which is pure and unconditional. All they need would be that you to feel okay. When you hear them out you feel the affection and care.

At the end of the day, all you need is kind word from your beloved ones, who make sure that all is going to be well and you’re going to be a person who can endure the adversities and come out successful. That’s enough.

That’s more than enough. Trust! Hope!

We Fall, We Rise!

While we fall, what happens when we feel deep and it’s more like a free fall? Imagine a leap and fall to death. You visualize yourself dying. Visualizing the pain. Going through the desperation. Yet we still want to fall.

Something stops You. Sometimes from your inner soul and most times an external force. But does that even matter? You’ve already gone through that process. Even at that minuscule time-frame, your mind went through all your closed ones and their reactions. You’ve thought about all the possibilities and repercussions.

Then We gradually raise. Now what matters? Literally Everything. You’re filled with gratitude and abundance. Even a crow shitting on You. You feel it and reminds that you’re alive. You’re grateful for that. At this point you’ve attained the appreciation of near existence. You Breathe and exist in the Abundance. You’re never afraid of your inner soul anymore. You’re just exonerated by Yourself. You feel free. You become Authentic to your Own Soul! You’ve Become completely You. Your Individuality shines bright. Now you’re no more a half to be compensated by a better person. You’re a complete person and You’re the best version of Yourself. You’ve Healed.

Wander. Seek. Wonder. Hope. Love!

SidBharati